So Called Development!!

That Person held him tight. The blood wasn't stopping only. He yelped with pain. He tried to give him first aid with water and a torn cloth hanging out of his dirty bag. 


That small harmless creature which was a toy for those naughty kids roaming around with pebbles just before few minutes back, was now a piece of amazement lying in the lap of that person who was known as mentally retarded non existent person in our educated but thoughtless society. 


He became calm after sometime as the pain was eased a bit.


That person stood up and left with a smile on his way. 


I looked back at the relieved injured dog lying on the pavement silently; and then walked off with moist eyes, wondering where our humanity has lost over the time since we call ourselves developed and educated. 


Wasn't that person more thoughtful than we are or we are just nothing more than robots any more? 

Make A Difference!!

Breaking the silence, that voice seemed like coming from far "What you looking at the wall? What you thinking? What's going on?" I saw his face just in front of mine, staring at me, puzzled.

"No nothing, just like that". I tried to distract him.

"Don't think. Act. Do something for them. Get a life that makes a difference, to the society, to you and people related to you." He sounded different.

"What you talking about?" I wasn't already feeling like discussing anything about it. Why he always understands what is actually upsetting me.

"Don't pretend. I know, the condition of those slum and street kids is still bothering you. Tell me isn't it." He looked deep into my eyes and I couldn't lie. We saw them on the street corner, drinking and smoking, of the slum where we went to do a story for next edition.

"Yeah, what future they have, tell me? What ever they earn or get they use it in illegal things, they take drugs and all. Their parents worked and lived like this and even they not going to do any better." I am a really emotional person. I don't know why these thing trouble me like anything ever since I was a kid. Well. I am not really proud of that.

"Okay, I know that but how is you getting upset going to help them, tell me?" He sounded mature.

I kept quite as I had no words to utter. I looked into horizon and kept looking till a bell rang in my head.

"Why don't we spread awareness among them? We can use our paper and Rosh's NGO for it. What you think?" I had hope in my heart and excitement in my words.

"How?" He looked confused.

"Lets educated them. Lets make them see a brighter future. Make them feel the importance of their existence." I looked at him.

He smiled and nodded in approval. Obviously there was no point of objection. 

Let Lives Live!!

It was drizzling out and the air was soothing. She looked out with hope to get some peace. Suddenly she felt wetness on her cheeks, she dint even realize when two tears slowly fell down on them. She wanted to cry her heart out but only crying wasn’t going to help her anyhow this time. She had to make a move, a move of change and with her full effort.

The report was about to come out at anytime. A report which was about to decide future of her and her kid which is still to take breathe in this air for the first time. A report, which is supposed to decide destiny of the unborn kid. She could see it almost, demise of her hopes.

“What you looking at? What is there out? Could not you realize the rain drops are coming in the room? See, the carpet near window is all wet.” He closed the doors of window.

She was so lost to even realize her husband has come in the room.

“Aah, Yeah! Nothing, I was just letting the air come in the room.” She sounded like she just woke up.

“Oh! Okay!! What time the doctor is coming, six or so?” He asked unaware of the battle going inside her heart and brain.

“Yeah”! She replied deadly as soon as he left.

‘Is he the same man whom she married just five years back? Can a person change in only this much of time? Do I even know him? If yes, then why does he seem so strange to me now.” She thought with a lump in her throat.

All his words started coming in her head at once.  The whole conversation of last night started playing like a film in front of her eyes.

“Mom does not want a girl child. It has to be a boy this time, you understand?” He almost shouted on her.  

“What If it’s a girl again like last time?” It was her.

“Than same, we’ll get this thing aborted again” he sounded real rude.

  

“Thing? It’s not a thing. It’s my kid. Be it boy or girl, it’s a part of my existence. How can you say like that?” How cruel can a Father get, she wondered?

“Whatever you say does not really mean anything to anyone. I earn and it’s my house. Now you have to decide what you want. Your husband or this piece of meat?” and he left her in tears.

She did not want this test. She did not want an abortion also of her last baby girl, but she did. She was weak, really weak to protest for this.

But she hoped for good. She wanted it to be a boy this time. She did not want any disputes in family. She looked at the clock. It was almost six in the evening and she heard the door bell. Her heart came in the mouth at once.

“It must be doctor” and she rushed to the door of her room and stood behind it. She dint want anyone to see her or tell her to come there.

She heard whole thing and collapsed there itself.

“Why fate is playing games with me” she dint understand.

“Did you hear what doctor said? We are going to the clinic tomorrow. He’ll arrange everything. It’s again a girl” he sounded cruel.

She dint say anything and closed the door behind him. It was the time. To choose what she thinks is right. She went to bed and cried till she decided what to go with.

She packed her bags and thought of leaving.

To a new life, to take breathe of freedom, to let the baby breathe in the air she wished to. She could see the independence lying ahead with the revival of life.

A Ride Unforgettable!!!

Recently I happened to have a ride on slow Mumbai local train after such a long time. I don’t have to travel much as my work place is hardly 20 minutes ride from my home so cab and the bus are the easiest ways to travel. Yes, the place where I used to work before or I better say where I worked for not more than 3 months was a bit far from my place. But again my directions were different so there was no much of crowd in the trains. Well, being a kid of Indian Navy Personnel we are actually destined to live in one of the most posh and well maintained areas of Mumbai, South Mumbai.

Well, okay!!! That’s not what this post is about. So I happened to have an exam this Saturday and unfortunately the center was in Western Suburbs of Mumbai. For them who don’t know what they are, let me tell you. The most crowded places with people and traffic plus most polluted areas which are situated on the western line of Mumbai are called western suburbs. Even tough it was a very Sunny Saturday afternoon the train became too full to travel.

Well, I got the train from Church gate which happens to be the place from where the trains start, so was all empty. I boarded it with no hassle as I reached there in advance.

The journey was really amazing and the weather became so pleasant so I was actually enjoying the ride as the cold breeze was playing with my hairs my face with its soothing touch. That time I never knew that this journey which am enjoying so much right now is going to leave a remembrance on my mind for whole life.

Okay!! So what happened was after like 3-4 stations we crossed the train became so crowded tough it was only ladies compartment!! I thought of standing of the gate as it was really suffocating inside. Suddenly I heard a sound which was really loud. I really thought that someone might want to shuffle their places so they are arguing upon that. I turned around to see what’s going on and I saw two ladies shouting at each other on top of their voices.      

1^st lady “what the hell on earth you think you are? How dared you to push me, bitch. What if I would have fallen?”

I literally stared at her face. She was sitting on a seat comfortably. I looked around at the people standing and of course they must be getting more pushes from around but still quite.

“Even tough she would have fallen, where would she fall? Not off the train for sure.” I wondered.

2^nd lady “what do you expect me to do in this so much crowded train? If you don’t want to be pushed, why don’t you come by your own vehicle, bloody whore?”

1^st lady “yes, why you would not know? You some pander or what?”

This was it and the conversation started in their local languages which end up with them pulling each other’s hair like anything and shouting without caring about people around.

I really could not understand what they were talking but first time in my life I saw this kind of face of people who call themselves urban.

“Why are we becoming so impatient and intolerant?” I thought and got no answer. 

She!!

I looked into her eyes and smiled, she smiled back from her heart. Hmm, from her heart because I could see the reflection in her eyes. She was sitting at the gate of a fast local I generally come home by. I waved at her slowly and she smiled again. Many people were there but none seemed to bother that a kid is sitting on the gate and she might fall and yeah, why would they? It’s not a new thing in the fast paced life of the city of dreams Mumbai. I wasn’t feeling well that day so came early from office. I wanted some restful and peaceful time but don’t know why felt like talking to her. I told her to come and sit on the seat. She hesitated once but still came and sat in front of me and gave a shy smile and yup, there was the sweetness and innocence of a kid too. ‘Then what makes these kids different from others’ I thought. I looked her Mom who was selling tiny stuff to other people and got the answer.
“What’s your name”? I asked, guess smile just found the way to my lips and dint want to leave.
“Khushi”. She replied after a pause.
Hmm, nice name. “What does it mean, Khushi”? I asked again.(regretted later)
She looked lost. She looked at her Mom then looked back at me, smiled and replied “I don’t know”.
Ohh, how could I expect that she will know that? Hmm, have I already mentioned that I regretted it later? Yeah, I did. Good.
“Well it means happiness, lots of smiles. You smile, right?” and she agreed with a smile. I wanted to know how old she is. I thought at least this she must know. And here I made another mistake. She had no clue about her age. I told her to go to her Mom and ask. She was seven.
“You go to school”? I don’t know why I was taking so much interest in her. May be because I felt a connection or a bond but something was there.
She became sad a bit and replied slowly “I went but they say my name is not there in the list, they dint let me sit in the class.”
What? Who? How? Why? A lot of questions started appeared at the speed of thought but I asked just one. “Why? Dint you send your father to talk to them?”
She looked at me, blank look and looked away without even saying a word. I rethought my question and looked at her Mom. She had all signs of being married Indian women. Then what’s wrong? I thought but couldn’t gather enough guts to ask. I looked away and started looking out of the window. No, stop it, no more questions please. Enough now.
“Three years ago he left us and ran away with someone” it was her. I got stunned. I looked back at her, she was looking at me constantly. “What”? That is all I could say.
“That is all I know, you see the kid sitting near my Mom, my father ran away with his Mom”. There was no smile but a tough look too.
I couldn’t say anything else and yeah, what could I say. I kept quite but kept looking at her innocent face.

Those Stops!!

Well i was walking in crowd but still alone.. Me too ws a part of crowd only but still could feel special(god knows what was giving me this being special feel), Thats wat they say is 'Charm' of mumbai.. You are a part of crowd but still special.. Sounds funny but true.. but that day was special i guess because i could feel a bounce in my walk. A bounce which was because of something good.. I left home for office and as usual cought the bus to churchgate. In morning there is a lots of rush everywhere. Everyone to there destination but in hurry as that place will move ahead if they wont catch it soon. Strange, i used to think in starting.. No one cares what u doing, where u going, whta is happening to you and anythning till it doesn't affect there chores.. Well that is the pace here. If you move along you can win otherwise you will loose nothing but you.
Its my habbit to observe everythnig outside when i travel. Its my routine and guess what tough i travel by the same route everyday i find things new. I dont even realize untill i reach to NCPA. but that day i couldn't see my eye catcher. M eye catcher, yeah, a lady with short hair, a bag in her hands, a blanket wrapped around, sitting out the building with blank looks. People see but no one notice. Everyday the same thing, the same place and same look. many times i wanted to go to her and her 'what is wrong' but some one said that i'll reopen her wounds like this.. This day she wasnt there, i found it strange as from last 6 months she was there and a mystry for me.. May be she found some other place or she's no more as her bag and blanket was still lyng there.. God knows..
moved further...
Near chrchgate, in front of Sarvodaya, a general store there is a tree. A small one but a place to live, home for a family. A family of a lady and her two kids. Even they have a small kitchen of a stove and a cooker and may be a plate too. A lot of people, may be thousands paas from there and dont even look nad yaa, why will they?? everyone has more important things to do. A lot more important.
moved further......
A very old lady outside elphinstone road station, sitting side by the fly over, having a basket of fruits and waiting for someone to come and buy somthing atleast so that atleat she can feed her family. Sitting there morning to evening with a hope nad struggling with life in the age of 80-85.. And obviously reaching to office is more important than buyng fruits from her even if they are cheaper than their actual prize.
moved further.....
Coming in the local in evening everyone encounter with a lotz of beggers, kids specially.. They have innocence on face no doubt but have some dreams in heart. People pity them and even sometimes give money. But nothing gonna help them. They will keep doing the same for the rest of their lives. Who's gonna work if they easily get someone's hard earned maney for doing nothning. If don't get much and want more, still hungry or have some pain.. Still no worries, marijuana and drugs gonna work till they get something. After all life teaches everything. No one remembers they had some dreams and desires.
move further....
Almost about to reach home but still have to walk a few meters. A tiny gal with her in her lap, having few balloons and tryng to sell but still have a lots of self esteem nad dignity. Workng hard for making things better..
I was walkng in crowd again but dint feel special.. my walk was slow. just reached home but coudnt be happy as i used to be.. But i cant change anythng. Need to be stronge enough for fight for the rights of needy and deserving.. Sometimes things just happen all of the sudden and turn around ur life or to some another direction.. Mine has..

Rising from ashes or........??

1 day I wasn't feeling good so went out to on sea side to roam around.. I was too busy in thinking about my own changed life so couldn't notice that there was a tiny girl who was selling balloons.. She asked me to buy one and I saw she was having a tiny baby in her lap. I denied to buy one as I felt have too grown up for them now so obviously don't need balloons to be happy anymore but she said 'Please, my brother is hungry didi, just buy one only.' I thought it'll look funny if I will have a balloon in my hand and will go somewhere so I offered her some money to feed her brother. To my wonder she denied and said 'I can't take it like this'. I was amazed as I could see need in her eyes.. I had no option but to buy a balloon and I gave it to a kid passing by. She smiled and I moved on..
Last new year me and my 2 friends thought instead of partying we would spend our day with some social work.


It was just an incident but it reminded me of 1st Jan'10 (New Year) when We (me and 2 of my friends) went to an orphan-age there in Jaipur.


 We got them sweets, fruits and chocolates so obviously all kids were smiling.. When we entered all kid were like 'Hello Didi'. Being with all of them and getting to know was a different feeling. 


After sometime when I asked 'Do u guys go to school??' they nodded with a smile(though it dint seem like a happier one). I thought that the mentors are taking good care of them but when I asked them about what they want to become in future once they complete their studies, they looked at me like I have asked them like have they seen God recently.


I wondered whats wrong.. I looked at their mentor, I found her a sweet lady initially.


She said "Tell Didi, that what you all want to become, tell no, what i told you all yesterday"..and kids came up with doctor, teacher, pilot, manager n all thngs.. I really got surprised as when I asked them first they dint even seem to understnad anything and now all wonder answers... Any way I dint get positive vibes from there so came out with a heavy heart.. 


I met a kid who was one of them outside and asked him to come with me to main road.. He told me in the way about all this.. Their mentor told them to all this yesterday evening as a lots of people come to visit and donate there..


I was feelng so bad.. All the way I was just thinking whats the future of these kids.. I have no complaints from my life now.. I should be happy the way it is but what about then.. wat about their crashed dreams or they even know what dreams are meant for?


I imagined them rising from ashes but now i guess 'going towards' would be perfect instead of 'rising from'..


Just god knows all...